“Viewed superficially, love and attachment look alarmingly similar. When we look deeply, however, their differences become obvious. The first thing we notice is that a person in the grip of attachment is primarily attached to “I”, his or her pampered self, whereas one who is truly in love seldom thinks of the “I” — it’s all about “you,” the object of love. The second thing we notice is that the attachment to “I” produces tentacles of ownership: one who is attached wants to own people and things, and make them “mine.” One who truly loves, doesn’t own anybody: a person in love respects freedom, one’s own and others’, so no one is tied with the noose of ownership.
The difference between attachment and love becomes even more apparent in the results they produce. Attachment can — and often does — lead to dependence, anxiety, anger, jealousy and stress. Love, on the other hand, leads to deeper happiness and greater freedom…..Attachment stifles love and, if left unchecked, can destroy it. The problems in relationships are caused by attachment, not by love. The more the love in a relationship, the greater is the experience of happiness and freedom.”
— Swami Tyagananda (“Walking the Walk”)